2002-12-18 - 11:07 p.m.

Amazing Race Finale

Sorry for the silence over the last couple of days, folks. I've been preparing for a big chess game. Is this a waste of time? Maybe.

Tonight was the two hour finale of Amazing Race, and if you have this episode on tape and haven't watched it yet, you probably shouldn't read any further.

That being said, now I have to say: AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!

*Bangs head on desk*

How, how, HOW could Zach and Flo possibly win that???? Flo was the queen of the whiny crybabies and Zach was practically pulling her every step of the way. To TRY to be more gentle about it, Flo seems like a pampered little princess, and the stress and privations of the Amazing Race caused her to have an emotional breakdown. She reverted to virtual babyhood and literally had a temper tantrum where she refused to move.

I am somewhat mollified by the fact that Zach really DID deserve to win, carrying Flo around like a ball and chain. I can imagine him being a councilor at summer camp and being put in charge of the bedwetters' cabin. It seems grossly unfair that he should have to split the money 50/50 with Flo. Gee, if they split up the money according to who did the ten roadblocks, Zach would get $900,000 and Flo $100,000. I'd call that a more equitable distribution.

And of course, there is some relief that Ian and Teri DIDN'T win. Heh. On a board I frequent they are referred to as "Satan and his concubine." True, once Ian entered Vietnam he started to seem less like a total mean, yelling bastard, but in my opinion that was a case of "too little, too late." At the end he referred to Teri as his "lover and best friend" but for most of the race he was yelling at her as if she was a particularly stupid dog: "C'mon, hurry up, girl!"

I am saddest though for the Oh Brothers, though. They were cute and funny, but they finished a distant third. Well, at least they weren't done in by their fatal flaw: second guessing themselves and changing detours.

Here is what got Flo and Zach across the finish line first: as they completed the last roadblock at the park in Seattle, a cab just happened to be waiting for them, and I believe that this was the cab that had just dropped Gerard and Ken off. The fact that they were able to get a cab so fast after the roadblock was what got them the million dollars. Maybe Ken and Gerard should have held the cab? Unfortunately this is what this season has been all about - teams bunching up and then the order of finish being determined by random things like that. I'm not sure whether that is the best way to run the race or not.

One thing that I was relieved to see, however, was the fact that the spoiler I'd gotten two weeks ago turned out to be bogus. The same dork that spilled the beans that the Wonder Twins would be the last team eliminated, also revealed the following: Flo and Zach, and Teri and Ian were seen hotfooting it through a Seattle airport, implying that the Oh Brothers were out of the race. While they DID wind up in Seattle, all three teams were there at the same time. So the first piece of information was true, the second flawed.

I've really enjoyed this show all season, so I suppose I have to reconcile myself to this bad finish. Hmph. Like I needed more proof that the world isn't fair and that virtue is seldom rewarded.