2002-10-31 - 11:55 p.m.

Halloween? What's that?

Here's an indication of the little bubble I live in: I'd utterly forgotten that it was Halloween until I went to bring my chess column to the newspaper and was startled to find a witch with a big, black pointed hat sitting behind the receptionist's desk. Good grief!

I had no idea that the newspaper would let employees come in costume. One of the photographers was sitting at his desk with a very satanic looking red silk devil's costume. Who says the media take themselves too seriously?

One of the reporters there suggested that I should have come dressed as a bishop, but these days that would seem rather like a joke in bad taste. Besides, I think rooks look cooler.

There never seems to be much Trick or Treating around the Hamster Palace. I bought three bags of candy for the store, thinking that was far too little, but at the end of the day nearly all of the third bag was left. In fact a good deal of our candy supply was depleted by one horde of 16 kids who came in at once. Most of them didn't even bother putting costumes on.

Several people always ask us: "why do you give out candy when you could give out comics instead?" Well, we'd love to give out comics instead of candy, but usually this doesn't please the kids. They're always asking "do you have any others?" Hey, it's a free comic, kid, suck it up! It's easier to avoid the whining and the problems by just giving out candy, which nobody seems to object to.

Some years ago the comic companies tried a promotion to get people to give out comics instead of candy for Halloween. The name of the promotion was "Rot a mind, not a tooth." Heh.

The last group that came in was a bunch of local kid that are out problem children, the pranksters and the shoplifters. The local convenience store was giving out free ice cream today, and they took the opportunity to streak some caramel sauce across one of our windows. Oh well. That's all the Halloween damage we got, so I count myself lucky.

In fact, most of the litter around the neighborhood was paper ice cream dishes and plastic spoons and spilled ice cream. I wish they wouldn't give out ice cream on Halloween, it's sort of like handing out guns and ammo to a bunch of convicts. It's a wonder the whole neighborhood isn't covered with hot fudge and rainbow sprinkles.