2001-07-13 - 11:02 p.m.

Choices and Decisions

Yesterday I got a call from my friend Jerry, the guy who helped me with the chess class I taught a few months ago. He had a little problem.

He runs an intensive chess class for children himself for two weeks in the summer. There is a beginner class which he teaches himself, and there is an intermediate class taught by an expert from downstate. Well, last night the expert unexpectedly cancelled out on him. Actually it wasn't completely unexpected - this guy has flaked out on him before.

So he had a problem - the classes were set to start in just two weeks and he had no teacher for the class. He knew that I had taught kids before, and he wondered if I could fill in?

My first impulse was to say yes. My first impulse when someone I like asks a favor is ALWAYS to say yes. Hell, even when someone I don't like asks for a favor I still want to say yes. It's a weakness: I like to please people. Instead, I put it off and told him I'd give him an answer the next day.

I thought about it for a while and I broke it down into pros and cons.

Pros

1) I'd make Jerry happy by solving his problem

2) I'd have another chance to try to prove I could teach chess to children

3) These kids would probably be a little more motivated than the other group I had, because most of them were graduates of Jerry's beginner class.

Cons

1) I really did not enjoy my first experience with teaching a chess class to kids, in fact I hated it

2) I really had no time to prepare any sort of lesson plans or order any course material

3) The first class I taught was one day a week for 90 minutes over the period of a month. This class was FIVE days a week for FOUR hours for two weeks.

4) Once again, the pay was puny. In fact, I'm not sure if there was any pay at all.

5) There were going to be twice as many kids as in the other class and the average age was going to be younger.

6) The first class was held at a school that was only 7 or 8 minutes away. Jerry's school was over an hour away.

7) The class ran from eight to twelve daily, which meant that I would probably have to get up at six a.m. to get there on time.

8) My having to get the comics would make me very late on Wednesdays.

9) My car is not being very reliable recently, in fact I am on the point of replacing it. A two hour commute daily might be more than it could handle. And, finally...

10) I would really, really feel miserable if this class turned out to be another bomb

I had to face facts: the cons had it. I had to tell Jerry no.

Jerry is a good natured fellow, and he took my refusal well. He'd kind of suspected I was going to say no anyway. I then gave him some leads on some other people he could ask, or who might know other possible teachers.

Afterwards I thought about my decision. I realized that, in the very short term, the easy decision would have been to say yes, and make Jerry happy. It would have avoided the awkwardness of disappointing someone I liked who had helped me out in the past.

However, the long term result of my saying yes could have been much misery.

I'm not that happy with myself for backing down on a challenge, but I am a little bit proud of myself, too. For once I made a thoughtful decision instead of letting myself be manipulated by circumstances.